Category: Film, Television & Music

Straight from Fangoria, here’s a little something that made my week: Zombie Honeymoon writer/director David Gebroe is working on Bad Vibes, a werewolf film that sounds too trippy to be real. But apparently it’s happening, and even John Landis (who needs to regain some of his werewolf credibility, in my opinion) is said to be involved. Here’s Gebroe’s synopsis.

“BAD VIBES is a hippie werewolf movie that literalizes the death of the ’60s. Set in the Bay Area during late 1969, it’s about a psychedelic rock band called Sunrise Majesty who sequester themselves away on their communal ranch while they work on their new album. Unfortunately, their lead singer Max has contracted a mysterious venereal disease that transforms him into a werewolf—but not the kind that’s affected by full moons. Max transforms every time he’s around a square, making him more like a ‘squarewolf.’ When in the company of other hippies, he finds himself compelled to have sex with them to spread the ‘disease.’ After transforming the rest of the band, Sunrise Majesty holds a love-in on their ranch to which only their most die-hard fans are invited. The plan? To have sex with them all, transform them into ‘squarewolves’ and send them out into the world to eliminate the terminally unhip. This will be the next step in the evolution of the werewolf film.”

This sounds like an amazing combination of horror, retro camp, stoner rock aesthetics and pure ridiculousness. I’m in love. According to Fango, I’m not the only one – John Landis would like to executive produce or “present” the film, freak folk musician Ariel Pink is writing the soundtrack, and Greg Nicotero of KNB EFX is interested in doing the special effects makeup (for a deeper look at Greg’s work, read about The United Monster Talent Agency). No word yet on what the next step is, but here’s a look at the first poster art:

When I first saw this in my Google Alerts feed by way of PerezHilton.com, I thought it was either a joke or a two-year-old article that had fallen through a time warp. The ever-reliable Bloody Disgusting has the exclusive, though, so I’m inclined to believe it: Universal is searching for writers to help reboot the “Wolfman” franchise just 13 months after the release of the previous reboot, and this time they’re skipping the theaters and going directly to DVD. “The only details I have,” writes DB’s MrDisgusting, “is that it’s supposed to start a fresh direct-to-disc franchise like what they’re doing with Death Race, although their direction is still unconfirmed.”

This sounds like a very recent development, possibly triggered by the 2010 film‘s recent Academy Award win for Best Makeup. The direct-to-DVD approach makes me doubt they’ll be willing to pay for the continued makeup services of Rick Baker or Dave Elsey, and let’s face it– other than Hugo Weaving’s performance, the makeup effects were the only reason to go see it in the first place. But wait! I can think of two reasons why this could be a Really Good Thing®:

1. Direct-to-DVD releases don’t need to have Hollywood box office appeal, so they can take bigger risks. Big-budget films with wide theatrical releases need to clean up at the box office in order to pay for themselves, so they have to be more generically appealing. By releasing directly to private viewers, Universal can make this Wolfman re-imagining as dark, gory, twisted and otherwise stylistically radical as the material warrants without having to worry about what mainstream reviewers, audiences or Cate Blanchett think.
2. A smaller budget means the film needs to earn Universal less money in order to be considered a “success”. A successful film tends to spawn sequels, no matter how niche the market is. If Universal plays this right (Universal executives: see point 1 and then trust your director, writer and other staff), the results could appeal to enough horror/werewolf fans that additional films pay for themselves. Thanks to the Internet, small but devoted audiences can turn a lovingly-produced oddity into a cult hit pretty easily.

This is all speculation stacked on top of a rumour, but in the face of vapid, expensively-polished duds like “Red Riding Hood”, a down-and-dirty hard-R-rated Wolfman reboot on DVD sounds pretty damn good.

It has been suggested that I am too quick to torch upcoming werewolf movies and television shows if they don’t fit my personal tastes. In response to this offensive and entirely true accusation, I offer this neutral, non-judgmental post.

Catherine Hardwicke’s teen-friendly re-imagining of Little Red Riding Hood opens in theaters tomorrow, and people on the Internet are talking about it! If you would like to talk about it too, here are some things you could bring up:

• SeenOn.com is a private sale site (registering an account is free) that deals in Hollywood exclusives. They’re selling Valerie’s red riding cape, pendants from the film, a signed script and other Red Riding Hood merchandise.
• If you like posters of girls running through snowy forests, or posters in general, you can win a copy of the Red Riding Hood poster from The Trades just by giving them your contact information.
• Amanda Seyfried wore nude heels from Lanvin’s spring/summer 2011 collection to the premiere. (???)
• The colours in the film are vividly supersaturated because this one time, Catherine Hardwicke went to Burning Man.
• Gary Oldman can be very polite when confronted by fluff interview questions from Moviefone.
• Reviews so far have been very decisive: the film is a hollow, bloodless, joyless grab for teen money.
• Hollywood executives will soon stop green-lighting trash like this, not because some guy was snarky on his blog, but because clueless fad-hopping, glossy over-production and deceptive marketing tactics provide rapidly diminishing returns.

Okay, so I couldn’t keep that whole “neutrality” thing going for the whole post. I tried, though!

Shock Till You Drop brings us the discouraging news that The Howling director Joe Dante is trapped in 2003: he’s starting preproduction for Monster Love, a horror-comedy film that chronicles a forbidden romance between “a werewolf and a vampire [who] fall in love, igniting a war between their respective communities. It’s ROMEO AND JULIET with fangs”. Experiencing déjà vu? Hang on, it’s about to get worse. Here’s a bit of the synopsis:

After PETE, a young dogwalker, gets dumped by his girlfriend, his slacker buddies convince him to run naked through the city park. As the moon rises, the boys laugh, howl, and transform… Later, a distraught young woman named MAGGIE is contemplating suicide when she’s surprised by an enormous wolf. She snarls, baring her vampire fangs. The wolf grins and barks: Let’s play!

This has got to be a mistake or a joke, right? Werewolf-vampire romance is not interesting anymore, if it ever was. Underworld made it (sort of) sexy, Twilight killed it and Jason Friedberg & Aaron Seltzer defiled the corpse with Vampires Suck. I just can’t imagine how Monster Love is going to do anything new with this paper-thin concept.