You need a new coffee mug.
Or tea mug. I don’t care how many you have already. Yes, I know all about the dusty ones at the back of your cupboard that you never get a chance to use because you rinse and refill the same one for three days straight. That’s gross. Put that crusty thing in the sink and get a fresh new one.
Oh, you “don’t drink caffeinated beverages”? Doesn’t matter. Somewhere in your house or office you’ve got at least one mug full of pencils, paintbrushes and highlighters, and I’m going to come in there in the night and knock it onto the floor like a giant cat, and it’s going to break. You’re going to walk in and see your scissors and nail files on the floor in a halo of shattered ceramic and you’re going to say “AQ was right to tell me I need a new coffee mug”.
Because you do. And you should make it this Snarlbucks Coffee mug by Cassandra Aponte, aka TeknicolorTiger, because the design is an excellent werewolf-themed improvement on the muddled character in the original, and Cassandra is a great artist who deserves the two bucks or whatever cut Redbubble gives her on this.
Important addendum: You can get this mug or anything else in her store for 20% off with the code GIMME20.