I saw this German Burger King ad on The Red Project and loved it. Great character design, especially on the Wolf.
Hey, it’s Saturday morning.
Category: Pop Culture
Trendy werewolf stuff for trendy werewolf people.
Mattel’s “Clawdeen Wolf”: a Bratz-style werewolf toy who shaves her legs
Mattel’s new “Monster High” dolls are your typical Bratz-style teen divas, but as the name indicates, they’re also monsters. All the usual suspects are represented, including a werewolf girl named Clawdeen Wolf. So we’ve got another toy franchise that seems geared towards training 10-year-old girls to be rail-thin airhead fashionistas… but by making these dolls monsters, is Mattel is also saying “it’s okay to be different”? Perhaps! In a recent LA Times article, Mattel Brands general manager Tim Kilpin said “They’re fun characters to build a world around. Who doesn’t feel like a freak in high school? It started with that universal truth.” Okay, so there’s some positive empathy, which seems promising… but now read Clawdeen’s bio. Am I crazy, or does it only mention her monstrous aspect in neutral or negative terms? This line is particularly worrisome: “Plucking and shaving is definitely a full time job but that’s a small price to pay for being scarily fabulous.” In other words, “I am different and unique, but through constant painful effort I can change myself to fit in.” Great. Picture Clawdeen locked in the bathroom, shaving her legs and crying, “Ginger Snaps” style. Hurry, Clawdeen! If you do a good job and get all that icky hair off, your friends will still like you, and then you can get back to your favourite activities– “shopping and flirting with the boys!” Nice work, Mattel.
There’s a great post about Clawdeen and Monster High at the She-Wolf blog that’s well worth reading, especially if you love to get annoyed about children’s toys like I do!
Hey UK werewolf people, you have a week to register for the “She-Wolf” conference
I mentioned it in June and I’m reminding you again, so that perhaps some of you will register, and go, and tell me all about it. If you need a reminder about what the conference is, here is that reminder:
The conference is entitled She-Wolf: Female Werewolves, Shapeshifters and Other Horrors in Art, Literature and Culture (but She-Wolf for short). It’s on Thursday 9th – Friday 10th September 2010, at the University of Manchester, UK.
This is a smart conference put on by smart people who want to talk about werewolves, women, and werewolf women. They’ve got 40-ish spots left, so if you’re in the area, I encourage you to go. Check out the conference site or the official blog for more info.
Are you a werewolf (for real)? This fellow will give you money for proof
Are you a genuine lycanthrope who can’t drive to the woods on the eve of a full moon because your Tercel needs a new transmission? Are you a conscientious werewolf who has to choose between paying for expert-prescribed werewolf supplies and paying the phone bill? Well you’re in luck, friend, despite today’s ominous date. deviantArt’s lazywolf will give you $5,000 US in cash for incontrovertible proof that you are a really real (and true) werewolf. For real. Want to cash in? Here’s the deal:
I know a lot of people on ~thepackplz, at the Google werewolf group page, here on dA, in personal emails, and many other places around the net have claimed to be werewolves. Thing is, they never have any proof; all they achieve is to tauntingly raise false hopes right out in front of me like a juicy steak, and then yank it away mockingly as I try to take a bite. I’d need solid, concrete evidence such as original-sized photos of yourself in werewolf form, a video of yourself transforming, etc. (Mental shifting or anything like that doesn’t count; has to be an actual physical transformation!).
So what are you waiting for? Give up your most precious secret and put your freedom (or life) in danger for less than two month’s salary some quick cash today!
The Sixth Slave – A Worgen and the Worst Bedtime Ritual Ever
Today’s Penny Arcade is about World of Warcraft, Gabe’s Worgen character and the artificial nature of game quests. It’s also about the opposite of a glass of warm milk.
CS-UGH (in which I get cranky about werewolves on TV)
Oh good, CSI creator/writer Anthony Zuiker just told Deadline that they’re planning an episode for the original, Vegas-based show “about a vampire and werewolf convention”. You can tell he’s on a real creative roll because in the same paragraph he mentions Justin Bieber and a shark in a swimming pool. This is going to be fucking great. I’ll have to make room for that on my DVR, along with all those episodes of “The Gates” and “Vampire Diaries” I’m watching while I BeDazzle another “Team Jacob” t-shirt to sell on Etsy. Seriously, get Rob Zombie to direct that CSI episode or don’t even bother squeezing Laurence into that suit.
Won’t someone please bring werewolves to North American prime time TV in a way that celebrates and enjoys the horror roots of the monster? The closest thing to a horror werewolf we’ve got on TV right now is a show about a serial killer / lab geek in the Miami Metro Police Department. I love you, Dex, but I’d love you even more if you were all about fur and claws instead of rubber aprons and bone saws.
I’m cranky. I’m going to have some tea and listen to some old Mighty Boosh radio shows.
Trailer for “Vampires Suck”: I will see this movie on general principles
It’s basically a “Twilight” spoof by the same people who did “Scary Movie” and its sequels, “Disaster Movie”, “Date Movie”, “Meet the Spartans”, etc. I will still be seeing it because I identify strongly with its message.
Hat tip: Graham T
The Trustworthiness of Beards, as Assessed & Charted by Matt McInerney
I’ve been super busy today, but I wanted to share this delightful chart with you. Have you ever wondered if you could gauge the general trustworthiness of a person, based on the beard they’re sporting? Graphic designer Matt McInerney says you can, and he has a chart to prove it. He claims there’s no scientific basis to his observations, but other than grossly exaggerating the threat of werewolves, I think he seems to be spot-on. The Philosopher? Good. The Neckbeard? Watch yourself.
Click for the full thing at a (much) larger resolution.
This is a real book: Warrior Wolf Women of the Wasteland
Yesterday I saw a tweet by David Malki expressing surprise over the existence of a codified literary genre called “Bizarro Fiction”. That lead me to a Guardian article on the subject which, while interesting in its own right, was immediately relegated to an inactive browser tab when I saw these words: “Warrior Wolf Women of the Wasteland”. That’s the title of a book by Carlton Mellick III, whose body of work (the most NSFW Amazon search result page ever) makes it abundantly clear that he’s one of the genre’s most prodigious authors. Despite my love of werewolf horror and all the spilled entrails that comes with it, I am a gentle man of delicate sensibilities, so there’s not a single title in that list that I would purposely read… other than Warrior Wolf Women of the Wasteland. That book is now required reading despite (or because of?) its astoundingly, deliberately trashy premise and pedigree. Dig on this synopsis from Amazon:
They call themselves the Warriors, their enemies call them the Bitches. They are a gang of man-eating, motorcycle-riding, war-hungry werewolf women, and they are the rulers of the wasteland.
A century after the fall of civilization, only one city remains standing. It is a self-contained utopian society protected by a three-hundred-foot-high steel wall. The citizens of this city live safe, peaceful lives, completely ignorant to the savagery that takes place beyond the walls. They are content and happy, blindly following the rules of the fascist fast food corporation that acts as their government. But when Daniel Togg, a four-armed bootlegger from the dark side of town, is cast out of the walled city, he soon learns why the state of the outside world has been kept secret. The wasteland is a chaotic battleground filled with giant wolves, mutant men, and an army of furry biker women who are slowly transforming into animals. Trapped on the wrong side of a war zone, Daniel Togg makes new friends and new enemies, while uncovering the mysteries of the people living in the wasteland and how they came to be there.
Sold. Did I mention it’s illustrated? It’s illustrated. I will read this book, and I will report back here with my findings. For werewolves. For science. Wish me luck!
Kylie Minogue is in “Jack and Diane” and the tabloids want you to know she looks scruffy
Judging by the excitement in my inbox this is important enough to mention, although I feel like I’m succumbing to peer pressure. Musician Kylie Minogue has what sounds like a minor role in everybody’s favourite werewolf lesbian romance movie, Jack and Diane. People who care how pop stars look were apparently very upset at her appearance in a series of off-set photos, but then were relieved (and titillated) when it was revealed that she was just “in costume” for her role as a lady who likes other ladies. I was going to include one of those photos with this post, but then I remembered this site isn’t TMZ or Perez Hilton. Wanna know what she looks like? Just do a Google image search for her, then imagine she has some fake tattoos on her arms and hasn’t washed her hair in three days.