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A. Quinton — Aug. 13th 2010
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Are you a genuine lycanthrope who can’t drive to the woods on the eve of a full moon because your Tercel needs a new transmission? Are you a conscientious werewolf who has to choose between paying for expert-prescribed werewolf supplies and paying the phone bill? Well you’re in luck, friend, despite today’s ominous date. deviantArt’s lazywolf will give you $5,000 US in cash for incontrovertible proof that you are a really real (and true) werewolf. For real. Want to cash in? Here’s the deal:
I know a lot of people on ~thepackplz, at the Google werewolf group page, here on dA, in personal emails, and many other places around the net have claimed to be werewolves. Thing is, they never have any proof; all they achieve is to tauntingly raise false hopes right out in front of me like a juicy steak, and then yank it away mockingly as I try to take a bite. I’d need solid, concrete evidence such as original-sized photos of yourself in werewolf form, a video of yourself transforming, etc. (Mental shifting or anything like that doesn’t count; has to be an actual physical transformation!).
So what are you waiting for? Give up your most precious secret and put your freedom (or life) in danger for less than two month’s salary some quick cash today!